11 iunie 2012

Am…plus participiu trecut

Am rănit un sâmbure de caisă cu zâmbetul meu pe jumătate, ironic şi imatur…am ucis un melc în drumul meu grăbit şi nehotărât…am sărat o cireaşă amară în visul meu fad şi incoerent…m-am răzbunat pe frumuseţea cerului cu nori împlumburaţi şi ploieticiţi… m-am răstit la candoarea globului de cristal fin până ce l-am distrus…am spart toate tonalităţile, mirosurile şi imaginile lumii; le-am pisat şi apoi le-am topit în sânge pe care l-am scurs semi-atentă şi semi-responsabilă într-un tub pe care îl port legat de un şnur invizibil la gât… am descătuşat toate ororile şi bucuriile şi le-am unit apoi laolaltă pentru că nu poţi plânge fără să râzi şi nu poţi râde fără să plângi…am irosit toate gândurile, ideile, şansele, iubirile posibile…le-am aruncat nepăsătoare într-un colţ, ca apoi să-mi pară rău, dar nu pentru că-mi păsa, ci pentru că mă plictiseam. Am rănit, ucis, sărat, răzbunat, răstit, spart, descătuşat, irosit, aruncat…razele palide ale începutului căruia nu i-am dat nicicând o şansă.

Would you listen to me?

Would you listen to me? Would you trust me with this one right here? If you just listened for a bit, for a little while, with patience and paying attention...everything would stop and you'll be able to hear...; in between all these loud voices that don't say anything, you'd have the surprise of hearing whispers that say everything there is to say. And when you hear that, you begin to feel, you begin to feel me, to feel that you know me and that you get me and that you really see me. There's no fear, or shame...you just look at me and see me. And when you do that, you begin to breathe, step by step, enjoying every new sound, colour , smell. And when you begin to breathe, you feel the real life in your blood, in your body...and everything around just flourishes and starts breathing with you at the very same moment. And you get to live this great, unspeakable harmony. Everything combining with everything; everything matching everything. And once you acknowledge this, you just can't go back again. Because it's perfect, and you can't go any further than perfect. So...would you just listen to me? I hear the voices that matter, I see the simplicity and the beauty of it all, I can elope from a reality that can kill, destroy, burn all those voices that matter. It's for them that I'm fighting so badly, because I want to hear them still, no matter what. And now I want you to hear tem too...because I think I'm selfish and I think that if I show this to you, we can be happy. So...would you just listen to me? For a while...breathe and hae a little bit of patience and trust me...Can you do that, please? P.S. : I could have given you so much more...